Birthdays for me are special, and it's not because of the Cakes or the Parties. 

It's not even because of that attention you get, where people feel the need or urge to say something nice to or about you, even if it is a lie or not entirely true, (kind of like what they do when someone dies) or where people are simply nice to you just because it is your Birthday.

Especially when you "belong"  to an organized group of some sort.  Like an office. Someone starts it, so others have to awkwardly say something nice or they start to feel like the only one who doesn't like you or wish you well.. I see through all that, so, I'm often not bamboozled by that, I mean it is nice to hear and read those things, but it doesn't form the basis of my mood. I mean if it does, woe unto you the day that they forget. Your depression go be season film wey no dey finish. What it really is, is a sugar rush and nothing more, it often wears out, sooner than you want it to.

Birthdays for me are special because I'm often implored to take stock of Assets and Liabilities. We would like to think that this has nothing to do with relationships. I mean, why is a relationship an Asset or  a Liability? You ask.

But, every form of association plays it role. 

Your relationship with a person, something or a people will do two things.

It will either Add to you or Take away from you. You are probably thinking, well sometimes it may nether add nor take away from you. Well, Exactly my point! why then does it exist?

How do you determine Assets or Liabilities?.. It is simple, Use the Before and After Measure.

Before I met you what was I like, now that I have been with with you, what has changed ( Positive / Negative) 

Also play a mind game... If I let go of "This" what would be different?, usually the answers to these questions, are an indicator of what you should let go or hold on to.

Now understand that, just because something contributes Negatively to you, does not mean it is in itself "Bad". 

You can't make an absolute theory off of how something affects you. That is personal.

Also, just because something is good for you doesn't make it so for everyone. Life is certainly not a goose and gander affair, especially yours.

Another thing is, whether you like it or  not, with every new birthday you have less and less time to get things done.

So.... You need to figure out which Activities have been a colossal waste of time. The need to focus suddenly becomes more important than ever before.

But what does it mean to focus ?

Well I'd say it means to give attention to the right things and while that might seem easy, it does require sacrifices. Some things will be sacrificed and it is what it is.

I'm trying to figure it out, but really that's what birthdays are about for me. 

Any other day could be a party, but the day I was born, that's the most significant day of my life.

So, it is often a mixture of gratitude and evaluation.

But none of these ever made me turn down a birthday gift. So, if you are planning on getting me a birthday gift, please go ahead I'll say Thank you. You never know, it could be the only value you have added to my life all year long.